The Wolfman Cometh.

Jun 10, 2001
I awoke today and realized that I hadn't eated in a day and a half, so I made my way to Whole Foods for some grub and a drink. After so long I had ceased to be hungry. I did feel like I might fall over though. So eat I did. I stopped at flipnotics on the way home and grabbed a Chronicle and a Hazelnut Frape with mocha. There was a pretty girl there with a white laptop and KOSS headphones on, jamming to MP3's undoubtedly. You'd think a big geek like me could find something to talk about, but alas. So I headed home and took a nap.

Heres where it gets weird. I dreamt that there is a whole bunch of people who don't seem related to one another walking or running or riding a bike down the center of a wide road. One tall man tells us that the first to return wins. I have no idea if there is a prize or anything, but everybody took the race deathly seriously, so I did too. The race was to run as teams. Everybody had to cross the finish line as soon as possible. It really felt more like an evacuation than a race. So we all buddied up, on the run.

There was an asian schoolgirl riding a bicycle nearby. She looked slow. I picked her. So there we go, hauling ass on a bicycle away from, or towards some dangerous goal. The bicycle wasn't cutting it. We pulled over into a gates trailor park community. I approached one resident and verbally convinced him that I was supposed to test drive his car for someone named Charlie. This seemed to make sense to him and he helped me out through the narrow gate. It was a big 70-s style Plymoth. A huge, gas guzzling American car. She sits in the passenger's seat and I haul ass out of there.

The car was really lousy to handle, and in our mad rush to get somewhere, or escape something, we skidded slideways over curbs, crashed into walls, and smeared lots of shrubbery and mailboxes in our wake. The huge filthy, smoking American engine kept roaring away. We reach our destination which is a cabin set up in some deep dark woods, away from civilization. We pullied into the crushed rock driveway and hopped out. She ran into the first floor entrance of the 2-story picturesque cabin as I surveyed the arrival of our entourage from the second story balcony. They were delivering boxes full of paintings, personal articles, sports gear, etc. I think that asian bicycle girl was moving, and she had some kind of mystic signifigance.

The cabin sits on the top of a 50 foot steep hill among tall trees. Light shining out from the glass patio doors was the only light illuminating the scene. Back and forth, people raced down the lone path to the cabin in the darkness. I the wind began to blow. My senses got super-acute. The wind turned into a howling. The sound came from all around us. The beast was close. I shouted the alarm to everybody in earshot who immediatly turned and raced back to the cabin.

I eyed a lacrosse stick lying in a pile of boxes down below. I lept from the balcony and crashed down 70 feet below near the stick. No sooner had I grabbed the stick than the wolfman was upon me. I swung blindly and with full-force connected with his huge hairy head. He pounced on me, knocking me backwards into the hillside of soft, fertile dirt. I held his huge body off of me with the stick. His weight overcame me and soon pinned my throat to the ground with the stick.

He lunged his head in and tore a chunk out of my shoulder/neck with his huge incosors. My eyes clenched closed from the extreme pain. I opened them with my head tilted back, staring directly at a full-moon overhead. I entered some kind of berzerker rage and turned to the monster on top of me. I bit through the carbon reinforced metal shaft at my throat like it was butter. The shaft split in two. I thrust the sharp, gnarled stub of the shaft up through the creature's heart. His black body laid limp in the dank soil.

The end.

Suddenly, and without warning, my plans changed from an Emo's romp to a movie night at Adriana's. We watched "The Lady's Man". It was funny. Two thumbs up. Your butt.