Confidence.

Jun 29, 2001
I used to have self-image problems. I don't anymore.

I spent the beginning of today with Natasha. I grabbed my welfare check from the mail and picked her up. We grabbed some coffee at Flipnotics, and also picked up some Toy-Joy coupons that they were giving out at the register. We sat and talked about web design and school and how dumb life can be sometimes. Then we headed up to Toy-Joy to spend them coupons. Shortly after arriving I ran into Tamara and a friend of hers. We gave her a coupon. We had 3.

Austin is SOOOOO small. Tamara and I chilled one night at IHOP a few weeks prior. I feel like I belong here now.... and it's a great feeling. Everywhere I go now, I run into people that I know.

God bless the internet.

My pal Tim told me that the Pope has declared some old dead dude the Patron Saint of the Internet. Timmy's family is Irish Catholic. He has what I like to call, "Original Guilt". He's 23 and just finally starting to shake some of it. I'm proud of him. I'd link him if he ever got his page together. Come on Tim, snap to it! The teeming hordes of internet hotties are waiting for ya. ;) Isin't that bizarre about the Pope doing that? That will be reason number one million and one why I am not Catholic. Them Popes man, that much be one boring gig. I'd like to think that the Pope did it for publicity.. to give the church a more modern bend... and not because he discovered the alt.binaries.pictures.* newsgroups. What a fuckin' weird world.

I'd like to start a petition to declare me the Patron Saint of Internet Porn. I think it'd be really popular with the kids. I need to buy shirts with smaller collars.

Troy, NY is the "Collar City". The Arrow Shirt company had a factory there. They made collars. There is a bridge there. They call it the "Collar City Bridge". Collars were where it was at. My mother's parents met there, making collars. Then they had some 1940's style sex. I'm not sure what that was all about, but I suspect it's probably funner now. One thing is for sure though: they made my mom. And my mom begat me, with a little 1970's style sex from my dad. And I begat this webpage.

I got snazzed up and headed downtown to Swigs lounge for Jennifer's birthday party. Swigs is a fancy bar on the west side of the Spaghetti Warehouse. There is no sign. It's actually connected to The Bitter End, but that's not intuitively obvious from the street. They have men there that open the door for you. It's that kind of place. She's 24 now. Happy birthday Jenn! Jennifer is the second (and last) girl to chew my heart up really good. It's all good now though. She taught me the value of self-respect.

The hard way.

All her roommates were there. It was good to see them all again. They're good folks. I met her most recent ex too. He was really quiet and didn't talk much. I definitely have the feeling that Jenn wore the pants in that relationship. I drank an eight-dollar Martini. Although it was NASTY, it "did the trick". I hammed it up with her roommates about Strawberry Shortcake, the economy, fake palm trees, chocolate liquer drinks, jobs, family, and cigarettes. Nothing too significant. We said our goodbyes and I headed to Club Deville to meet Kesha.

I was just full of confidence tonight. I felt like the hottest shit on sixth street. I met up with Kesha and her friends at Deville. She had friends from California visiting. I'd like to visit there sometime. Californians I have met tend to act like they're coked up all the time. Like they're in their own alternate cartoon universe. Super-high energy. I think that would get old pretty fast. I consider myself a low to medium energy person. Her friends were really cool and fun though. It was a real challenge to hype myself up to their level. I think I sortof pulled it off. I squeezed a few good/fast jokes in. I love new and challenging social situations. I think I do pretty good at em.

I pride myself on being able to fit in everywhere and with everyone. I think I'm overcompensating for being so socially maladjusted in my youth. Thats why I don't have any tattoos or piercings. It would prevent me from being accepted in classier circles.

Kesha quit her job today. She had a thousand dollars in her purse. She bought me a drink. I drank it. And it was good. Amen.

It turned out that she was sorta seeing one of the guys at the table with us. That girl is craaaaaazy. The good kind, though.

After a while we headed back to our cars. They offered to drive me back to my car at the parking garage. On the way there, Payden, a guy she's also dating was pulled over for driving with TN plates. They gave him a sobriety test, which he miraculously passed. We sat on the grass watching it all go down. We thought he was going to go to jail. They let him off with a warning and Kesha drove his car home. They revoked his license, apparently. I'm not sure about the specifics. He was pretty shook up about it.

When I got home I felt pretty mellow, so I dusted off my MP3 colelction. Brokedown Palace by the Grateful Dead is what I discovered. It's exquisite.

Goodnight, cruel world!